


Here To Stay

by LivinOnARarePair



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alfie's Retirement, M/M, Ottawa Senators
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-09
Updated: 2014-12-09
Packaged: 2018-02-28 20:26:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2745851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LivinOnARarePair/pseuds/LivinOnARarePair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How Daniel and Erik handle Alfie's retirement.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Here To Stay

**Author's Note:**

> If your name and/or the name of someone you know appears in the box above, for your own sanity, turn away now.
> 
> To everyone else, I ask that you please not link this fic on tumblr so it never gets around to the people whose names are listed in the box above.
> 
> Hand-waving Alfie's family, even though it was so precious 'cause his kids had on Karlsson jerseys.

Being back in Ottawa is being home. He skates warm-ups with familiar guys in front of a familiar crowd, and Daniel is home. He’s aware of Erik watching him, as he always was, can feel the younger boy’s eyes following him. He banks and skims along the boards before coming to a stop beside Erik.

“Miss me?” he grins, slipping into Swedish like a second skin.

Erik’s eyes are a little wide, like he’s trying not to blink so he won’t miss even a fraction of a second of Daniel. “You have no idea,” he breathes, leaning into Daniel a little.

“I think I have some idea,” Daniel murmurs back, bumping their helmets together.

Erik smiles, looking a little sad, a little relieved. “Good to have you back.”

“Good to be back,” Daniel says. He closes his eyes and takes a slow breath. “Later, yeah?”

To Erik, it isn’t even a question. He answers anyway, “Of course.”

Daniel nods and makes himself step back before he kisses Erik right there on the ice. He skates off, immersing himself in the next drill.

After warm-ups, they file into the locker room. The coaches and trainers leave them alone so Daniel can talk to the team. Daniel gives the most impassioned speech of his life, managing to only aim about half of it in Erik’s direction. Erik doesn’t take his eyes off of Daniel the whole time.

And then it’s back to the ice. Daniel takes his lap, making sure to look at as many fans chanting his name as he can because he wants to remember all of it. Someone pushes a microphone into his hand and he gives another speech, what feels like his hundredth in the last few days. He thanks the fans, the city of Ottawa, and promises that they’ll see him again, maybe not on the ice, but he will be around.

And then Erik’s skating over for the ceremonial puck drop. They barely tear their eyes away from each other long enough for a few pictures. Erik lets him win the faceoff, doesn’t even look at the puck. There’s some bustling around because there’s still a game to get ready for. Daniel skates around as long as he can before he has to skate over to the zamboni doors and leave the ice for the last time. Erik skates over, laying a hand on his arm. He looks like he wants to say something, opening his mouth with a few starts, before falling silent, looking a little helpless. Daniel pulls him into a hug.

“It’s okay,” he murmurs. “Go out there and make me proud.”

“Yeah,” Erik mutters, his hand shaking on Daniel’s arm. Finally, he has to let go and skate back to the bench.

The game is tight. Daniel watches like his life depends on it, eyes sticking on Erik more often than not. Erik plays his heart out, but in the end, the Sens fall to the Islanders. Losing always sucks, but Daniel needs to get to Erik right now. He avoids people the whole way down to the labyrinth of hallways, taking back stairs and going through empty rooms that he still knows by heart. He ducks into an alcove near the locker room, one in which he used to hold Erik close before home games, murmuring a hurried and breathless pep talk into Erik’s soft, soft hair.

Erik’s there in minutes, dropping his bag in the hall and slipping into his usual place in Daniel’s arms. He fits as perfectly as he always has, fisting his hands in Daniel’s shirt and burying his face in the older man’s neck, trembling. Daniel wraps him up, holding him tight as if he can push himself beneath Erik’s skin and stay there, stay with Erik and make him okay. They don’t speak because there are no words for this level of emotion, finally reunited for good. Erik looks up to Daniel as the man that made him who he is today, who molded him from when he was just a young guy in the league to the captain he is now. Daniel is his idol, and not many people get to have this with their idols.

It’s a little overwhelming.

“I’m sorry,” Erik whispers eventually.

“What for, baby?” Daniel murmurs.

“I wanted . . . ,” Erik hiccups, like he’s trying to hold back the emotion struggling to pour forth. “I wanted to win for you.”

Daniel holds him tighter. “It’s okay,” he says fiercely. “You played your heart out out there, and that’s all that matters. I’m fucking proud of you, okay?”

Erik nods against his shoulder. Daniel holds him so tight, he’s afraid for a moment he’s going to break the younger boy. But Erik’s not the young guy he was when he first came to Ottawa, when Daniel took him under his wing. He’s grown up, and he’s so, _so_ strong. He’s the Sens’ _captain_ now. Daniel couldn’t be prouder of him, and he tells Erik as much.

Erik laughs, a little wet sounding. “Tonight’s supposed to be about you, you know?”

“I know,” Daniel nods. “But right now . . . You.”

Erik ducks his head to press his face against Daniel’s chest, and Daniel runs a hand up and down Erik’s back.

“Come on,” Daniel murmurs softly. “Let’s go home.”

It isn’t a surprise when Erik kisses him, needy, hands clutching desperately. They’ve done this before, on special occasions. Daniel holds him close and kisses him back, because he knows Erik needs this right now. 

Erik pulls away reluctantly and hands over his keys, knowing Daniel won’t want him to drive right now. They duck out of their alcove, and take the long way out, sticking to empty hallways until they get to the parking lot. Erik zones out for the drive back to his place, tilting his head back against the headrest, closing his eyes, and just breathing. Daniel keeps his hand on the small of Erik back as he guides him into the building, keeps it there in the elevator, keeps it there as they walk down the hall and Erik unlocks his apartment door with shaking hands.

The apartment’s dark, but Daniel can see enough to know that Erik’s kept everything in its place. It makes maneuvering around the furniture familiar; he knows how far he can go before he needs to take a step to the left to avoid the couch. They’ve done it there once, Daniel remembers, Erik with his back arched over the arm, one leg thrown over the back of the couch, hands fisted in his own hair as Daniel worked his mouth low on him . . . but this is too momentous for that now. He walks backwards in front of Erik, hands clutching wrinkles in his lapels as he leads him to the bedroom.

Daniel ends up on his back in the middle of Erik’s bed, Erik kneeling above him, tongue searching Daniel’s mouth, remapping, relearning the taste of him. Daniel lets him, because this is Erik’s show now, lets him kiss for as long as he wants, gives him what he wants for as long as he wants. Eventually, Erik leans up, breathless, lips shining and used-looking, and his hands move to push at Daniel’s suit jacket. Daniel laughs a little at his fumbling and sits up, careful not to dislodge Erik from his perch straddling Daniel’s hips, and slips out of his jacket before pushing Erik’s off as well. The way he leans up presses them together through their dress pants, and the intensity and desperation slips up a notch. Erik makes a noise like he’s dying, and Daniel becomes determined to give him what he needs.

Erik’s hands find their coordination as they make quick work of the buttons of Daniel’s dress shirt. He pushes it off Daniel’s shoulders, letting Daniel take care of getting it the rest of the way off, and gets his hand on the knots of muscle of Daniel’s shoulders, clutching and stroking, sighing into Daniel’s mouth when Daniel kisses him again, hands moving deftly down Erik’s shirt, tugging buttons free as he goes. He maybe rips one off completely, but oh, well. Finally, he has the smooth expanse of Erik’s chest before him, and he wastes no time in getting his mouth on it, kissing and biting everywhere he can reach. Erik always goes a little wild for that, and this time is no exception: he throws his head back with a filthy moan and gets his hands in Daniel’s short hair, soft fingers sifting through the strands, sometimes guiding, mostly just hanging on so he doesn’t shake apart.

Daniel uses Erik’s distraction to pop the button on Erik’s dress pants, tug the zipper down, and get a hand inside, wrapping around Erik, hot and heavy in his palm. Erik makes a noise of surprise, then looses something between a sigh and a moan.

“Wait, wait,” he gasps, suddenly out of breath, panting in the still of the dim room. “I want . . . .”

“I know,” Daniel says. “I know. We will. Get these off, okay?” he says, pushing at Erik’s dress pants.

Erik gets off the bed in an awkward roll of limbs that only he could pull off as endearing and starts to push his pants off, cursing when they get stuck around his thick thighs. Daniel smiles a little and takes the opportunity to get his own pants and briefs off, before moving up the bed to pull open the nightstand drawer and retrieve the lube and condoms from where they’ve always been stashed. He lays them on the comforter and moves back to the middle of the bed as Erik climbs back up and takes his place straddling Daniel’s thighs again. Erik kisses him desperately, almost knocking Daniel over in his haste, but Daniel just chuckles gently and gets an arm around Erik’s back, reaching up to tangle his fingers in the younger boy’s hair, which never fails to calm him. Erik sighs and his hands come up to cup Daniel’s face between shaking palms as he kisses him slow and thorough, as if making sure he’s going to stay this time.

Daniel leans back to look at Erik, his eyes shining in the moonlight spilling in the window. “You okay?” he asks, one hand coming up to cover Erik’s.

Erik smiles, just a little, looking almost sad and nods, leaning forward to kiss Daniel’s forehead. “I missed you,” he whispers so quietly Daniel barely hears him in the already quiet room.

And Daniel knows it’s so much more, all of this emotion welling, rising and falling like the ocean’s waves in Erik, knows because he can feel it, too. He doesn’t know how it happened, but this boy has him so completely. But he knows he has Erik completely, too.

“You, too,” Daniel mutters, voice cracking, before his mouth finds Erik’s again, trying to communicate all of this emotion to the younger boy. Erik presses against him, trying to get closer, and Daniel wraps both arms around him, holding him ever closer. Erik’s cock gets trapped against Daniel’s belly, and Daniel remembers why they’re here.

“Do you want to--”

“Yes,” Erik gasps, turning his head to press his face against Daniel’s cheek. The “ _Please_ ,” comes sounding broken and so desperate in Daniel’s ear that it breaks his heart a little. But he’s going to mend Erik now. He’s got Erik broken down so completely for him right now, more naked emotionally than physically. Now he has to heal Erik, make him strong again.

“Okay,” he breathes, running a hand down the curve of Erik’s spine, trembling slightly, rising and falling erratically with his breathing. “I’ve got you.” And god, he’s as broken as Erik right now, but he has to be here for Erik now, be strong for him. “I promise.”

He drops one hand to the comforter, making Erik whimper at the loss, and his fingers close around the lube. He coaxes Erik to lean back with murmurs that may not even be words anymore, so he can lower a hand between them. He takes a moment to just look; the moonlight catches on the thick line of Erik’s left thigh, trembling a little, muscles straining to keep him where he is. The silver cuts back into shadow at the dip between Erik’s hip and thigh where Daniel especially likes to bite. There’s a contrast between Erik’s hip and his torso, his upper half tanner and covered in a fine sheen of sweat. He’s bulked up since Daniel saw him last, but he can still see the curve of Erik’s ribs as he heaves shuddering breaths. And up the line of his throat, adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows, up to his face, half in shadow, half illuminated in silver, moonlight catching the shine of his hair, the sparkle of his teeth caught on his bottom lip, the need in his wide eyes.

“You look good,” Daniel says absently, and Erik huffs a laugh.

Daniel lowers his hand between Erik’s trembling thighs, slick fingers trailing over the sensitive skin behind Erik’s balls and back, fingertip circling Erik’s hole. Erik shudders and grasps Daniel’s shoulders hard enough to bruise, gasping and pushing against Daniel’s hand. Daniel kisses his jaw and slips his first finger in. Erik moans like he’s going to shatter and Daniel wraps his free arm around him again, holding him together. Daniel pulls his finger partway out, but Erik clamps around him before he can get too far.

“Don’t go,” he whimpers.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Daniel promises, pressing a kiss to Erik’s neck, right over his pulse point.. “Let me do this so I can give you what you need, okay?”

Erik shivers in his arms and nods, his own hands coming up to clutch in Daniel’s hair again as he rocks against Daniel’s hand. Daniel works his first finger in him slowly, never pulling all the way out because he can’t do that to Erik right now, has to let Erik keep him like this. When Erik starts to make desperate little noises where he’s got his face buried in Daniel’s hair, Daniel slips his second finger in, and Erik rolls his hips down, trying to get Daniel in deeper. Daniel lays the gentlest kisses to Erik’s collarbones, the only skin he can get to with Erik clinging to him like this as he works Erik, scissoring his fingers gently before slipping a third in, a little early, judging by the way Erik hisses and tugs at Daniel’s hair, quickly letting go and petting instead, soothing the sting. Daniel presses a smile against the sweat-slick skin of Erik’s neck while he finishes stretching him. Finally, he pulls his fingers out and leans back, clean hand coming up to tug gently at Erik’s hair to get him to look at Daniel.

“Ready?” he whispers.

Erik bits his lip and nods, hips still working in tiny circles, searching for friction.

“Okay,” Daniel says, slipping a hand up Erik’s side and leaning up to kiss him softly before pulling away to grab a condom. Erik catches his wrist between nimble fingers. Daniel looks up at him. Erik’s eyes are wide. “I don’t want you to . . . I want to feel you,” he says. “I haven’t . . . with anyone else . . . since February, Olympics,” he adds, voice shaking in the still air, a deep blush painting his cheeks. Daniel reaches up to cup that cherry-coloured warmth, bathed in silver moonlight. “Okay,” he says again, easy, gently pulling Erik down into a soft kiss, hand returning to Erik’s hip.

“How do you want to . . . ?”

Erik bites his lip. “Like this,” he says, hands flexing on Daniel’s shoulders. “I want . . .”

He can’t seem to come up with the words, so Daniel just kisses him again. “I’ve got you.”

He guides Erik a little further forward so his knees rest on either side of Daniel’s hips and runs his hands up and down Erik’s still trembling thighs. “Are you sure?” Daniel asks, feeling the muscle jump under his palms and fingertips.

“I’m fine,” Erik says. “Please, just--”

“Okay, okay,” Daniel says, hands coming up to Erik’s hips again. Erik reaches down between them, getting a soft hand around Daniel and lining him up at Erik’s entrance. Then he secures his hands on Daniel’s shoulders again and slowly lowers himself onto Daniel’s cock. His breath hisses between his teeth as he sinks lower, the rest leaving him in a whoosh against Daniel’s neck when he’s fully seated with his hips snug against Daniel’s. Daniel wraps both arms around him again, holding him close and waits for Erik to adjust. Erik picks his head up and his mouth finds Daniel’s again. He kisses hot and desperate, and Daniel holds him close and lets him take what he needs.

Finally, Erik starts to move, slowly, and Daniel’s hands slip down to his thighs again to feel the muscle move beneath smooth skin. Daniel’s always loved Erik’s thighs. Erik finds his rhythm, hips moving in low, tight circles, interspersed with slow drags up so only the head remains in him before sinking back down until Daniel is sheathed in him entirely. Every time, he stays there for just a moment, feeling Daniel so deep in him and believing for just a moment that he can keep Daniel there with him. Daniel moves with him, thrusting up when Erik comes down to get as deep as he can, giving Erik as much as he can, because Erik needs it right now.

Erik’s hands slip deftly up Daniel’s neck to cup his face again, and he kisses him, slow and messy. Daniel reaches up to tangle a hand in his hair, always loving the feel of it between his fingers. Erik leans back, keeping his eyes closed as he leans his forehead against Daniel’s and takes a slow, shuddering breath. He leans back and looks at Daniel, eyes wide and shining.

“I love you,” he breathes in the now thick air of the room.

Daniel just blinks at him for a moment, fingers sifting through Erik’s hair absently, so shocked by the confession. Finally, he composes himself, and says, “I love you, too, Erik. You have no idea.”

Erik smiles, bright and so incredibly happy. “I think I have some idea,” he says, using Daniel’s earlier words against him.

Daniel smiles and then laughs because he’s just so happy with this boy before him. Erik hides his face in Daniel’s neck again and just _giggles_ , the purest form of happiness bubbling out of him. Daniel holds him close and laughs with him. His laughter eventually tapers off, though his grin remains, and he shifts his hips, thrusting up just right, and Erik gasps and moans where he’s still tucked against Daniel’s neck. Daniel runs a hand up and down the younger boy’s back as they start to move together again.

Erik takes over again, circling his hips with purpose now, and Daniel moves with him, finding his angle by the way Erik gasps and shudders when he hits just the right spot. Erik’s babbling now, filthy Swedish curses interspersed with Daniel’s name, and Daniel waits until he gets incoherent, so close with it, before he leans back on his hands. Erik stops and stares at him, trembling with need.

“Show me,” Daniel says.

Erik only hesitates a moment before he goes back to moving his hips in tight, erratic circles, one hand falling to his cock, stroking like an afterthought, wrist flexing to tease at the head more than stroking. It’s probably the filthiest and most beautiful scene Daniel’s ever seen. He can’t resist touching, though, so he sets his hands on Erik’s thighs again before slipping one between and back, stroking the pad of his thumb over Erik’s rim where they’re joined together.

Erik shudders and comes with a low moan, hand moving quick over his cock as he stripes Daniel’s belly. The already tight heat around Daniel tightens, and he’s close, but he holds off to watch Erik. Erik goes boneless, slumping forward, and Daniel catches him, arms around him to press his palms to Erik’s shoulder blades, brush his fingertips into the sweat pooling in the dip of Erik’s spine.

“You . . . ,” Erik mutters, and then he starts to move again, though Daniel can feel his body protesting. Daniel gets his hands on Erik’s hips to take over, thrusting into him, and comes with Erik’s overstimulated sounds in his ears. Erik whimpers as Daniel empties into him, sounding even more wrecked than Daniel feels.

Daniel comes down, and leans up to kiss Erik, getting both hands in his hair now. Erik kisses him wet and messy and perfect. Maybe it’s just afterglow, but Erik seems to . . . _glow_ before him. Daniel can feel the sweat drying on his skin, making him shiver in the cooling room, and distantly knows they’re going to have to clean up soon. He drops his hands to Erik’s hips again, lifting him gently. Erik whines in protest when Daniel slides out, and Daniel kisses his shoulder and says, “I know, I know, I’m sorry.”

He lays Erik on his back beside him and gets up to get a washcloth from the bathroom, wetting it in the sink. When he comes back, Erik is still catching his breath, moonlight illuminating all of him now, and Daniel takes another moment to look him over; the disheveled state of his hair, the sweat still glistening on his chest, the curve of his ribs as he breathes, his narrow hips with the beginnings of bruises already showing, down to his thighs, muscles still jumping under the skin with overuse. There’s no denying it: he’s utterly beautiful.

He turns his head to smile lazily at Daniel when the older man climbs up on the bed again. Daniel kneels over him and runs the washcloth over him gently, cleaning him up best he can. When he’s done, he tosses the cloth to the floor and gets his hands on Erik’s thighs, pushing the heel of his hand into the overworked muscles, massaging the tension out of him. Erik lets him, boneless and heavy, determined not to move. Daniel works him carefully and watches Erik fading, eyes slipping shut for a moment before snapping open again, until he finally gives in and lets sleep take over. Daniel finishes his ministrations and moves up the bed to curl around Erik’s sleeping form. Erik turns into him, snuggling up to him in his sleep, and Daniel smiles, wrapping an arm around Erik and pulling him in close. He kisses the top of Erik’s head and settles in to sleep.


End file.
